Two O’clock in the Morning
By Shanara A Schmidt

It’s two o’clock in the morning
and my world is quite and still
you and the children in slumber
crooning sounds……
from a dog up the hill.

So often I get up and wander
outside for a breath of fresh air
close my eyes…..
sigh…. inhale deeply……
remembering the smell of her hair.

Can’t help the feelings inside me
the warmth in the sound of her name
and nobody knows how I need her
in spite of the fear and the pain

For she has given me freedom
and a comfort I lost long ago
and why I can’t find that with you dear,
is one thing I’ll just never know.

She is sunshine and daisys and rain
and her laugh is a song in my heart
and to leave her……when I must leave her
makes me feel like I’m splitting apart.

Perhaps because she touches me
with longing in her eyes
or the sound that utters from her lips
when she is lying by my side.

And there you lie so sleepily
innocent of my aching heart
peacefully somewhere in a dream
not knowing we’re so far apart.

Why do her eyes ever haunt me
when I’m looking down at your face?
When I try to reach out to you
I am caught up in her embrace.

Yet I pray that she will not leave me….
and I pray that she’ll go away,
and I pray that I can protect you
from all that people may say.

And it’s two o’clock in the morning
and my world is quite and still
my mind cries out…”I dont love her!”
while my heart cries, “I always will”

Poetry is my window to the world; it is where I live. In the physical world I live in the Cascade mountains in the rain forest of Washington state. Nothing else matters. Heartache is an unforgiving master. 5/5/84. I am changed forever. My life will not have innocence again. I am published at Poetry.com and The Woodland/Kalama
Community News and currently am working on publishing a yearly calendar reflecting 12 of my poems.