KAMA SUTRA'S QUIZ SHOW
By John Thomas Murphy

That's my quiz show mantra blaring.
Heads bob, groove. You can always
count on that studio audience. It's a laser-
sound with an 808 kicker, fizzled
by a snare drum. My name's Kama Sutra,
and I did get picked on but not til high school.

Then, zoom!, soyonara reality. Thus, my friends,
(I have every right to imagine you as my friends!),
It's my damn game show, and I do win every night.
Buck-fiddy here, buck-fiddy there (in jillions).

I know what you're thinking, but I won't exploit
my name. Just cuz I'm Kama Sutra don't
mean I needs ta gets me a smut show, like:
Kama Sutra's Super Kama Sutra.

If you look at these people, the tantric sorts,
(like at www.tantra.com, 1st site that pops up
when you type my name in at google . . .),
they're 75% dead. Eyes locked. Damn, am I
a pervert cuz I peek during sex? Am I
a perv for (here, reader, you can add

a squirt sound. Have a sense of humor.)
Oh, okay. I see. Perhaps I'm not funny.
And I'll admit, I've never come or peeked,
or been in position to peek, or won jillions
of dollars. I don't even have my own song.
My name isn't Kama Sutra either; it's Mike.

Last name Hunt. Get picked on for that;
figured I could at least pick a cool name.
I think now, Reader, is when you lie.
Go head, say it: "I wasn't laughing at you,
Mike. I was laughing with you."

.

I am a high school English teacher from New York. I've been published in The Chronogram, Urban Graffiti, Promise, and The Poet's Cut.